As the sun sets on summer vacation...
Reflecting on some of the magic of a true summer vacation as an adult
When I hear the term “summer vacation,” I immediately picture lazy days at the beach, hanging out on the sand and swimming in the ocean. It’s ironic as I’ve never spent a single summer vacation on the beach, nor do I particularly seek out beach vacations. However, there is also an undeniable feeling of freedom and potential and opportunity that comes to mind. It’s a feeling that can only be achieved with an empty calendar, an openness to adventure, and the good fortune of having some spending money.
It’s a feeling that really defined the past few months for me.
Back in high school, many of my summer vacations were spent mostly at home. I spent days on end cycling through different interests – I spent entire days making my own jewelry and handmade greeting cards, playing Tetris online, reading fan fiction, researching places in the world I wanted to visit, looking at potential part-time jobs I could take…the list goes on. I didn’t quite have the freedom to just pick up and go wherever I wanted, so a lot of my free summer time was spent dreaming up what I’d do in the future.
This past summer felt both similar and different at the same time. The biggest similarity was the open-endedness: knowing that within reason, anything was possible. The biggest difference – and my favourite part of being an adult – was knowing that I could make it happen pretty much right away. I didn’t need to file it away for the future. I could go do all the right things to make it a reality.
In many ways, the summer vacation was intended as the pinnacle of my adult gap year. I came into the summer knowing that this might be the last true summer vacation I’ll have for a while. There were days when I felt sad that this is the reality of adult life, but more often, I felt grateful for the privilege to even have this summer vacation, and this motivated me to dive headfirst into making the most of each day.
Here are some of the highlights and lessons learned along the way:
Many of these are applicable outside of a summer vacation context and I hope you find them valuable.
It’s okay to do something just because it’s fun.
It doesn’t have to have a greater purpose. As an extension of this, I don’t have to be productive every single moment.
Have some plans, but not too many.
Up front, I committed to a handful of “cornerstone” events for the summer, such as weddings or visits to see specific friends. But at the same time, I left the rest of the summer up in the air. I didn’t fill in all the gaps and I only booked travel in advance if I knew it was likely to get very expensive later. This left me room to adjust my plans and make changes based on how I was feeling and also to accommodate fun last-minute opportunities that came up. I’m a chronic over-planner so this was a good way to challenge myself to trust a bit more that things would work themselves out.
Try new things and be bad at them.
I tried a lot of new things this summer, from solo walking on El Camino to meeting so many strangers to going bouldering for the first time to learning pickleball to picking up piano. I found a lot of beauty in trying new things because it meant that:
I related more to other people
I learned that the point is not to master every new skill – it’s just interesting to do different things from my usual routine
My brain and body were stretched in different ways
Ultimately, I found it empowering to be able to tell myself:
What’s the worst thing that happens?
I’m bad at it.
And so what?
The world doesn’t fall apart.
We continue to exist.
Remember that each chapter in life is finite.
I am a lot better at making the most of the moment when I know that it’s scarce. And in reality, every chapter in life is finite – we just sometimes forget that, or we can’t break it down into a unit of time that feels properly finite. For example, a lot of people move to new places intending to live there for a “few years,” and before they know it, they’re making plans to move away and they’ve barely scratched the surface of their bucket list for that place. I always think about life in seasons so that I don’t delay any experiences (lest it become too late!).
Friendships need watering, just like plants.
In high school, summer breaks were a time to spend hours aimlessly with friends. We’d finally have the luxury of sitting around doing very little together, letting the conversation meander and finding deeper ways to connect with one another. As adults, we still need this for our friendships. Not every conversation can be a regurgitation of all of our life updates. We need the space to have wandering conversations to water the friendship.
Some routines can be broken in the name of summer vacation, but not all of them.
For me, the new non-negotiable is staying fit. I didn’t realize it but there were parts of the summer where my exercise routine was lost as part of creating room for all sorts of other adventures – visiting friends and immersing myself in their day-to-day lives, traveling to new places, etc. I ended up feeling less-than-ideal after some of those pockets and realized it was in large part because I didn’t feel as healthy and fit as I’d have liked.