1:1s are more than just for you and your manager
How I approach 1:1s to advance my work
I was recently reflecting on my work calendar and the sorts of meetings that I enjoy vs the ones that I dread the most. I love days when all I’ve got are a handful of 1:1s, especially if they’re with coworkers I particularly like. (And even when they’re with coworkers who are just fine, I’m still usually pretty enthused about the day. Also to be fair, I am lucky that most of my coworkers exceed the “just fine” bar.)
I have a pretty extensive list of recurring 1:1s at work. Most of them are monthly—in fact, only 2-3 of them are weekly and those are with close teammates. I believe that I have slightly more 1:1s than the average engineer or product manager might, largely due to my role being extremely cross-functional. Not only do I work with my manager across an org of several hundred people (so I cover a broad range of topics and work with a lot of people), I also work a lot with people outside of our org.
I’ve had to figure out the right cadence of 1:1s over time as I’ve adjusted into this role. For most folks, once a month is the right frequency to check in where there’s new information for us to share with each other, we stay at a high level and broader vantage point, and the goal is clearly not to get into the weeds. If we do collaborate more closely on something, we usually end up with dedicated time on a more frequent basis to get into execution.
When I first started in this role, these 1:1s helped me build a sense of community, find kindred souls and people to whom I could ask my dumb questions when I’d exhausted my manager with them. Now, over a year in, I’m realizing these 1:1s play quite a few other roles.
First:
They often help me better understand the work I’m tackling, even if someone isn’t directly involved in the topic in question. I gather extra context and perspective. I gain a deeper understanding of my own work or the areas where I am uncertain as I describe what I’m working on to different people through the repetition. I identify blindspots or new areas that I need to seek clarification on from my manager or other stakeholders.
Second:
Sometimes, these 1:1s help me identify new areas I should be involved in. I learn about an initiative where they need some support from an S&O person. I learn about an initiative that’s closely tied to another one I’m already working on. Or, I directly get asked to help with something. This helps me grow in my role as I start to play a more active role in determining where I focus.
Third:
They help me stay more connected across the company. I learn about areas that are not that adjacent to mine. I find new topics of interest. I gain insight into who’s an expert on which topics and I learn about the quirks of various teams or leaders. I generally become a more educated citizen within the context of the company.
So, what should you takeaway about 1:1s?
They’re not just for you and your manager. You should find people who work adjacent to or alongside your team and start with a first 1:1 to introduce yourselves, get to know each other, and understand more about each other’s roles. If it feels helpful, suggest a recurring 1:1.
Even if you’re not in a cross-functional role, 1:1s can help you develop professionally and gain more context and perspective. No matter your role or title, that makes you better at driving towards good output and results.
Go in with some questions for the discussion. Especially if you initiate. Good questions to start with include:
What do you do in your role?
What is your team most worried about or focused on right now?
What is tough for your team?
How might my team be able to help your team?
What are some interesting initiatives you’ve seen around the company lately?
What do you enjoy doing the most in your role?
Completely agree! I often come out of 1:1’s thinking that they were surprisingly valuable (and enjoyable!)